Friendship / John the Baptist (2019-12-08, Advent)

[ 2019 December 8 __  2^nd Sunday Advent  ● Isaiah 11:1-10  ● Psalm 72 ●  Romans 15:4-9 ● Matthew 3:1-12  ●  ]

[__01__]   It is the mainstream historical viewpoint that John the Baptist was a rebel, a rebel and outsider and troublemaker.  A mathematician or political researcher might ask – is he just too different? Does he have enough  “percentage points” of popularity to be around in the next debate? 

          Are we supposed to stay away from him?  John the Baptist is a rebel.

          Who wants to make friends with such a rebel? Who wants to be seen with such a troublemaker?

          You do. I do.

[__02__]  It is also a mainstream historical viewpoint that such strange and rebellious non-conformists also go on to great success and attract followers.

          In big technology firms, we see the wealthy Facebook CEO, Mark Zuckerberg, a Harvard dropout … and the late Steve Jobs of Apple who is also on the list of top college dropouts of all time.

          Kids, do not try this at home.

          But, yet you do, I do.

[_03_]    The prophetic rebel – John the Baptist who says “repent the kingdom of God is at hand”  was also attracting large crowds of people to the Jordan River for baptism.

          Yes, his food was non-GMO  and super-organic in a world that did not know or care what that meant, and he was not a PSE&G customer and off-the-electrical-power-grid but… “At that time, Jerusalem, all Judea, and the whole region around the Jordan were going out to him and were being baptized by him in the Jordan River as they acknowledged their sins.”  (Matthew 3:5-6)

[_04_]      But, is John the Baptist popular only because he is outrageous?

          Is outrageousness the beginning of a relationship?

Yes, there are young people who have attracted the notice of their parents by, for example, having a boyfriend or girlfriend or just a friend who might not get the immediate magazine / Good Housekeeping Seal of Approval and parental seal of approval/blessing … and this “stranger” can be real controversy in the house.

          Parents, sometimes, have to walk a very fine line in what they say about a friend or fiancée to one of their children. But it does not mean that they have to remain silent about absolutely everything.

          For example, a parent might be viewed personally as outrageous – but I’d say it would be courageous – when – a parent dares to speak to, for example, an a future “in-law” and an adult child about their arrangement/choice to “live together” before marriage and to express disapproval. (This was something I observed in my family). In this case – ironically – the “boyfriend” and future in-law wanted to respond immediately to change the situation for the better… the flesh-and-blood child, not so much.  So, yes, parents have a responsibility to talk to their children about their behavior…while also respecting their own free will. It’s a fine line but an important line.

[_05_]     I bring all this up because in a book about love and Friendship, C.S. Lewis writes that “Every friendship is a sort of secession, a rebellion.”  C.S. Lewis is from England the U.K. and… while he is long since deceased..the U.K. right now knows something about rebellion and secession because the country is extracting itself from the European Community in the so-called British Exit or Brexit from a long-standing treaty/agreement from the E.U. in Europe.

          It’s a rebellion – whether the rebellion turns out to be good or bad in the end, we don’t really know yet. That’s on national and political level.

[_06_]       On a personal level, C.S. Lewis’ point, nevertheless, is that every friendship involves a “secession”…even a rebellion. (C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves, “Ch. 4 Friendship”, New York: Harper Collins, 1960,  p. 102)

          That is, every friendship involves a person finding and choosing the intrinsic beauty of another person. We do this by our own free will.

          Lewis contrasts friendship with love of members of the family whom we do not choose and whom we may even have to love against our own wishes. So, friendship invites a choice.

          And, thus, John the Baptist is calling us to friendship with God and with Jesus, a friendship that involves our personal choice, our “signing up.”

[_07_]     Can a friendship or relationships draw us away from God and his life and love?

          Yes, according to John the Baptist and this is his criticism of the Pharisees and Sadducees, a criticism, that Jesus himself will continue calling them blind guides, that their friendships not drawing them closer to God or to neighbor, but quite the contrary.

          John the Baptist, for now, simply questions why the Pharisees and Sadducees had come to him, to the Jordan River, for baptism if they only think that baptism is something superficial or momentary as a ritual.

[_08_]    John the Baptist was aware…himself that our connection to the Lord would bring a friendship that can also call us to a withdrawal, a rejection of what others may value as assets, that …

1.     Simplicity is more valuable – in Christian life than comfort. Do we not value simplicity in our friends? (Demonstrated by what he wears + eats.)

2.     Sanctity of life is more valuable than quality of life, a basic tenet of our own respect-life and pro-life viewpoint regarding the unborn child, the terminally ill, and anyone vulnerable. Do we not value friends who love us for we are …not just for what we can do for them? (John the Baptist asks us to make straight the path of God in our lives).

3.     “Love is more important than like.”  It seems we live an upside down world – as YouTube Catholic celebrity Father Mike Schmitz points out that …being liked is more important than being loved.  For example – people say this about others – “I not only love you… I like you.” It’s as though being liked is the goal. John the Baptist is a beloved figure who was loved, not always liked. Spoiler alert: next Sunday’s Gospel, he is going to be martyred. A true friend is willing to lay down his or life.

[_09_]    John the Baptist is a rebel, a non-conformist and a friend. He is making friends with you and with me and preparing us for friendship with Jesus Christ. His friendship may be REBELLIOUS …but it is not RANDOM. There is a plan.

          C.S. Lewis writes:

“For a Christian, there are, strictly speaking, no chances [i.e., nothing ‘random’].  A secret Master of Ceremonies has been at work. Christ, who said to the disciples, “Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you,” can truly say to every group of Christian friends, ‘You have not chosen one antoher but I have chosen you for one another.’

     [I think this also applies to our friendships within our parish family .. for those we worship  with , serve with and come to know… and not to mention it is also a call to me in my mission and ministry as a priest…  ]

     The Friendship is not a reward for our discrimination and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each the beauties of all the others.“ 

(C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves, “Ch. 4 Friendship”, New York: Harper Collins, 1960, p. 114)     
[__fin__]

   

Mind the Gap (2019-12-01, Advent)

[ 2019 December 1^st     1^st Sunday Advent.  ●● Isaiah 2:1-5 ●● Psalm 122 ●●  Romans 13:11-14  ●● Matthew 24:37-44  ●●  ]

[__01__]   Recently, I heard a priest’s spiritual reflection using the topic and theme and famous “safety warning”:  “Mind the Gap.”

          In London, on the Underground train or “Tube”, we are told incessantly by signs, by announcements to “Mind the Gap.”

          The 'gap' is not the retail store famous known as “GAP” and which now encompasses Banana Republic, Old Navy, et cetera, et cetera. But, the “gap” is a physical space between the station platform where we wait for the train and the floor of the train itself.

Those Londoners are in a very imperative mood every day, ”mind the gap” so you do not trip.

On this side of the oceanic pond, we mind the gap especially on snowy and rainy days, getting in and out of the car, entering a building. There is always another gap, space, abyss.

[__02__]  Is the gap dangerous only because it is empty? Only because it has a void, a vacuum of space to which we pay attention?

          Other transit systems have similar spaces: Newark light rail, Bergen-Hudson light rail, the PATH, NYC subway.

          And, I am suggesting that – on this first Sunday of Advent – there is a spiritual space to be minded, to be aware of.

          Yes, there can be danger, but there is also hope because of the dwelling and presence of the Holy Spirit in the gap as well.

[_03_]    It is the first Sunday of Advent, December 1^st, and in our worship-calendar, this is a new year and we are crossing the threshold of time. Mind the gap.

          In the Gospel of this Sunday of Advent, we ready about the end end of time, a caution to be ready:

          “for if the master of the house had known the hour when the thief was coming, he would not have let his house be broken into. So you too must be prepared for at an hour you do not expect, the Son of Man will come.” (Matthew 24:43)

[__04__]      The Catholic writer and teacher, Alan Schreck, observes that sometimes we think of the force of good and the force of evil as equal and opposing forces, like a BAD law-breaker who needs to be opposed and stopped by Jesus, the GOOD lawmaker and peacekeeper.

          And, so we might sometimes wonder, as we say about the police … why is he not around when we need him?

          This thought might naturally enter our minds if we were reading about the recent terrorist attack in London which did not actually take place on the London underground or on the Tube, but did occur we might say “in the gap.”

          The “gap” was and should have been a safe space on a bridge for people to gather and walk. Into the gap rushed a man with evil intention.

          Alan Schreck’s point is that God does not impose his will on any free creature, even those who may choose to disobey him with evil intention.  As followers of Christ, we have the assurance that God makes all things work together for those who love him. (Romans 8:28)  (Alan Schreck, The Essential Catholic Catechism, “Ch. 2, God, His Creation &  Man’s Rebellion”, Ann Arbor: Charis, p. 59)

          The Son of Man will come. Mind the gap. He enters into the gap.

[*** pause ****]

[__05__]    We often become aware of God’s presence at unexpected times, in the gap. It does not take a highly educated expert to recognize love, providence, goodness.

          Several years ago, on the occasion of a family celebration and my mother’s birthday …for the grandchildren, this was Grandma’s birthday and they attended. At the end of the joyous celebration, a granddaughter sat herself next to my mother in the car on the way home and pronounced: “this is the best day of my entire life.” She was age 7 (seven) years old at the time. Minding the gap, she was also being very watchful, very aware.

[__06__]      Jesus is urging us in the Gospel to be watchful, to be awake and specifically to be aware that our struggle is not just a personal struggle for excellence or for a personal moral standard so that we can produce a good report card for God or a high standardized test score in heaven.

          The struggle – the minding of the gap – is necessary because there is evil, in places such as London Bridge where it should be safe.  We can only pray we will not be put to such a test.

[__07__]    Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI (B16) wrote that we should be careful not to simply say “farewell to the devil” or pretend that he does not exist.

          We also do not want to give him too much credit.  Nevertheless, there are disturbances and examples of brokenness between people and within people that cannot be explained simply by an individual moral failure.  There are times when we do not acknowledge God, when we have a God-problem…or a God-void or God-vacuum and another spirit may fill that void or that gap. Mind the gap.

          Yes, there are evils that cannot be explained by purely natural or physical causes. There is something in between that we cannot completely control. (Josef Ratzinger (Benedict XVI), Dogma & Preaching, “Farewell to the Devil,” p. 204)

          If we consider the well-known 12-step programs for those on the journey to sobriety, the 1^st step is…”there is a power greater than myself”. But the power greater than myself is not only evil, but also good.

          Mind the gap. Be aware of the forces greater than ourselves.

          This is a practical reason why, for example, families and couples try to make the computer and wi-fi enabled devices not such a secretive and private experience, but keep things out in the open where everyone can see into the gap.

          Now, on the positive side, there is also the Holy Spirit, the ultimate gap-joiner, and bridge, the connection between the Father and Son in the Trinity, the Holy Spirit who has all the powers and virtues of Christ and dwells in our hearts as a Temple, the power to help us conquer our pride, to know the truth between good and evil, to give us real courage. 

          Should we fear the gap?  Can we not simply mind the gap? Is there anything to fear, to be afraid of? (Maybe we fear the “financial statement’ from The Gap (store) after Black Friday !)

          B16 wrote this about the virtue and spiritual gift known as fear of the Lord:

          “fear of the Lord is something quite different from a boastful recklessness that is unwilling to see the seriousness of reality. Part of true bravery [courage] is not concealing the extent of the danger but, rather, being able to see the reality in its totality …. And, the clearer the opposite of the Holy One becomes as well: the beautiful masks of the devil no longer deceive someone who sees from God’s perspective.” (Josef Ratzinger (Benedict XVI), Dogma & Preaching, “Farewell to the Devil,” p. 204)  Mind the gap.   [__fin__]

Or ... Christmas ? (2019-11-28, U.S. Thanksgiving Day)

2019 November 28 /   Thursday, Thanksgiving Day

Title:   … Or … Christmas?

[__01__]   Today, it is practically obligatory to say something in our conversations with each other at table, in the living room about Christmas [C.1225]. Yet, it is still Thanksgiving [T.1128] today.

          And, perhaps, even we are doing a little comparison or run-down of what takes place on [T.1128] vs. [C.1225], which relatives and friends we see or do not see.

          At least, this is the case in the U.S.A. where these 2 holidays fall within a month or so of each other, and thus we compare them. Several years ago, a friend told me how much he preferred Thanksgiving to Christmas.

          I’m not saying you should compare the two. They are not the same as, of course, Christmas is a Christian and worldwide commemoration of Incarnation of God in Jesus Christ and Thanksgiving is a harvest feast in these 50 states and in Canada…but in Canada, [THX] was on October 14, so maybe it’s not so connected to [C.1225] for our northern neighbors.

          I’m not saying you should compare [T.1128] & [C.1225], but given that we might, this is my starting point…

          And I suggest that [T.1128] may compare favorably to [C.1225] because we view [T.1128]  as ..

·        Less costly

·        Less compulsory

·        Less complicated.

However, I would suggest that for you and me, as followers of Jesus Christ, we are called to an attitude of gratitude each day which is, in its way:

COSTLY – COMPULSORY –   COMPLICATED.

[__02__]  1^st. “Costly”       Hey … I will grant you that [T.1128] compared to [C.1225] is a financial bargain, because you do not have to attend and bring a gift to a Thanksgiving party two weeks ahead of time. There are no – or fewer – gifts.

          But, does it not cost something to express thankfulness, gratitude, appreciation?

          C.S. Lewis wrote on the subject of LOVE that we can cry out to God from our poverty (i.e., from our need).  We can offer ourselves to God with our generosity. That is, we can make a GIFT. And, don’t we give gifts to others not simply because we “need” something back, but just to for the sake of giving.

          But, there is a third “LOVE” that goes beyond simply me needing something for myself or giving myself away. There is “appreciation” or in God’s case: worship and adoration.

          And, this is COSTLY.

          On Thanksgiving Day, we are called not simply to appreciate the person who bought or made the meal, but to appreciate all of God’s creation, in all its wonder and the many workers, field workers, farmers, truck drivers, civil engineers who built the roads … it is costly to appreciate all of this, but also necessary, for we cannot take for granted the created world which God gives us.

We are called to acknowledge it in gratitude. That costs something.

[_03_]    2^nd. “COMPULSORY”

          The word “compulsory” means “required”. It seems that more “stuff” is required or not optional on [C.1225] … is a holy day of obligation, Catholics go to church, décor, gifts, tree, lights.

          It’s wonderful – beautiful devotion – that you are here for church today – but it’s not compulsory and this national American observance is not connected to God, to Jesus, explicitly.

          And, so, [T.1128] is more easily disconnected from God as Father, Son, Holy Spirit.

          But, I suggest our attitude of gratitude is not just one that helps us to get along with our neighbors and friends and family, but also helps us to be right with God.

          Today is a day to give thanks and praise to God for our mothers, fathers, spouses, children, grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, friends, that we acknowledge them as gifts of God.

          You – the parishioners and parish family of Our Lady of Lourdes – are gifts of God to me.

          And, you – who are so kind – have acknowledged to me and to Father Bob Suszko and Father Jim Chern, Monsignor Robert Coleman, Father Paul Donohue and all the priests who say Mass in church here …you have acknowledged your gratitude for our service, our priesthood.

          This reminds me that my priesthood is a gift to you and for you, not something that I created or established. I share in the one one priesthood of Jesus Christ.

          And, as such, I am called top guard and protect this gift not only for myself but primarily for you. That is compulsory and for your benefit and for your children, for everyone.

[__04__]      3^rd. COMPLICATED.

          Of course, we naturally think of Christmas as way more complicated than Thanksgiving with the décor, gifts, parties, music.

          But is it really so simple, so facile, to express our thankfulness?

          Is the attitude of gratitude really so easy?

          For example, it’s nice to turn to someone and say… “you are great..” … “you are awesome”… I like hearing that too. It’s not complicated.

          But, then, again, being complicated is not always a bad thing, to tell someone exactly what he or she did to help you, to change you, to challenge you.

          Sometimes it is complex to express our thanks to a child in a way that the child can really understand what is important and to know that his or her contribution at a young age really makes a difference and why.

          And, it is also complicated and necessary for us to express our thanks to God, our thanks not only for what we have, but also for what we do not have.

          To express our thanks even for the cross, for the difficulties, for the sorrows that have changed us and enabled us to grow.       

          To express our thanks for those who have had the courage to stand up to us, to correct us, to tell us what we really needed to hear.

          Thanksgiving: it’s not just one day. It is complicated. It is compulsory. It is costly.  “Stand up and go,  your faith has saved  you.”    [__fin__]

Latneness & Mercy (2019-11-24, Christ the King)

2019 November 24 /  34^th Sunday

●● 2 Samuel 5:1-3 ●●●  Psalm 122 ●●●  Colossians 1:12-20  ●●● + Luke 23:35-48 ●●

Title:   Lateness and Mercy.

[__00__]    Jesus Christ the King is the feast today and we begin with this reading from Samuel about David being made King of Israel.

          And, it was notable that when David was made King, he was not the likely choice. He was the youngest of all of the sons in the family. The prophet Samuel thought he was to select one of the older sons to be king, but nevertheless David is selected, is called.

          The last, youngest, latest to arrive became FIRST.

          As the eldest child in my family, I always thought that the “last’ and youngest children got more…had it easier…

          But, whether we are first or last, we may think we are not getting what we deserve. The good news is that the last can be first.

[__01__]   In the Gospel today, we see the virtue of being persistent and persevering, even when arriving late, even when delayed.

          Have you ever been noticed because  you were delayed, or late, fashionably or unfashionably late to an event or gathering?

          Our local NY philosopher-comedian Jerry Seinfeld depicted this in the humor one of the episodes of his 1990’s comedy – Seinfeld – in which the theme of lateness and the danger of lateness is portrayed in a house guest and visitor…

          The main characters Jerry and Elaine are both involved because the house guest is at Elaine’s home and he is a marathon runner from Trinidad & Tobago named Jean Paul who was in the Olympics and became famous for over-sleeping and missing his event, the  Olympic marathon. Elaine tells Jerry about it, and Jerry meets Jean Paul. Jean Paul reveals that in his room – at the Olympics --  there were separate knobs for the alarm  volume and the radio volume and that he neglected to - before he went to bed - to turn up the volume for the alarm. Thus he overslept and missed the race.

          Thus a theme of the episode is how to get to NYC Marathon on time..that’s what the show is about. “Jean Paul” does not want to be late again. Being late has been his downfall…he does not want to repeat the experience.

[__02__]   This is the Sunday of Christ the King and we read about the thief on the cross who says, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

          Jesus, remember me.

          One way that we can be remembered – or memorable – is when we show up late.  In the fictional Seinfeld example, the marathoner Jean Paul cannot escape the infamy of his lateness. He was always trying to overcome it.   It’s not really clear whether his new friends are helping him.

          Is the “last” or latest going to be first? Lateness can be good news.

          According to Gospel/Christian value, yes, this is possible and there is no one later …more delayed in repentance than the thief on cross at Calvary.

          On Good Friday, he made a dramatic entrance at the 11^th hour, as we say.  “Jesus remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

          Is he any different, however, from the characters in another example, those in the parable of the workers in the vineyard, the late-arriving workers who are paid a full-day’s wage..and this really annoys the workers who had worked all day? Imagine…the late arrivals receive the same as the early arrivals.

          Lateness is not always bad news.

          The theme of the Seinfeld episode is that there is always one more human intervention in terms of a better alarm clock, a better hotel room, a better reminder system that can prevent lateness. And that summarizes our scientific everyday world view. Are you late? Then, turn up the volume.

          Jesus, however, is saying that being late is not necessarily our downfall … it all depends on what we do when we arrive.

          There is also the famous quote by comedian Woody Allen: “80 % of success is just showing up.”

          At least the good thief shows up. That’s more than we can say for 11 of the 12 apostles for whom the crucifixion was not a Must-See-TV experience for them and they scattered and went into hiding. They did not want to be there, to see or be seen

[__03__]      Am I present when I show up?

          I’d like to share an example which shows that – at least in my case – showing up involves not just a willingness to be appear and to be seen … but really to be known by the other.

          The good thief wants to be known.  Regarding myself, I am not so sure.

          A few months ago, I arrived at a gathering in which several people were seated in a circle, everyone was listening, taking notes, writing stuff down… band I arrived about 15 minutes after the start. I was uncomfortable about my lateness, but everyone was quite welcoming and understanding.

          I was handed some papers and I sat down then realizing that I had no pen, no blue ink, no black ink, nothing to write with. Someone kindly offered me a pen with black ink which I immediately refused. Why? Because of course I did not want anyone to know that I was not only late but also unprepared.

          Therefore, for me…  “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”

          While it is true that lack of punctuality once in a while is not the greatest of all offenses against God and neighbor, I was aware that my lateness and my inability to acknowledge it and then take the help that was offered…well… my faults were in high-def / HDTV for all to see.  But that’s good news. Then, I could be aware of my need for re-charge of mercy and the energy of grace.

[__04__]     [*** pause ***] 

          It is the role of the Church and disciples within the Church …you and me…and me in my role as a priest to teach others about God’s mercy.

          The priest is present – I am called to be present to you – in this journey of the road to conversion. 

          In this regard, yes there is a “Saturday afternoon” schedule for confessions, but it’s also true that a priest – myself included – does nothing more important – around the clock, anytime, anywhere than to hear confessions and to celebrate God’s mercy.    

          This is not because the priest is a perfect model of virtue.

          When he celebrates… ……  CCC 1465  ---1465 When he celebrates the sacrament of Penance, the priest is fulfilling the ministry of the Good Shepherd who seeks the lost sheep, of the Good Samaritan who binds up wounds, of the Father who awaits the prodigal son and welcomes him on his return, and of the just and impartial judge whose judgment is both just and merciful. The priest is the sign and the instrument of God's merciful love for the sinner.

[__05__]    Another experience of lateness, delay, running late…

          And a priest’s role in doing so, for me.

          It was a significant experience for me with a parish priest of my youth, when I was a teenager.

          So, there was this Catholic youth group, we had a leader/chaplain who was named Father Anthony and we took a trip to an amusement theme park near what is now Mountain Creek Ski Area in Sussex County, New Jersey.  We were not skiing..we there in summer for the rides at what was called Vernon Valley Action Park. I am dating myself by even mentioning this long-since-closed place.

          Anyway, it was a one-day trip, for which we arrived around 9 am at the park and were supposed to be back for the bus at 4 pm. I was part of a group who decided it was way too restrictive to observe such a rule so we stayed in the park for an extra 45 to 60 minutes.  Maybe no one was was going to be on time and we were having a good time, a passive-aggressive good time.

          The bus left without us, but there was one parent – a mother – who had driven had an 1980ish station wagon and she drove us home in the station wagon.   We were told that our leader – Father Anthony – was quite displeased and upset. Being late was NOT GOOD NEWS at that moment.

          And, when we arrived back, Father Anthony told us of the danger and difficulty which we had caused.  I got the message. I also sensed in him a concern that was truly fatherly for our welfare, a father who wanted to level with us…while also trying to move on and move forward.

[__06__]      A few months later, there was a parish youth retreat at which one us happened to reflect on the summertime experience at the park and the peer pressure and “herd mentality” that took over and led to our going astray and being 45 minutes late.

          Hey…it took us a few months to figure it out… sometimes it takes a few months to know what you did wrong and put it out there. But it’s never too late.

          And, while this admission of guilt was more of a public witnessing than a private-confessing, I could see that Father Anthony’s role was similar in that he rejoiced at the conversion experience, the realization …and rejoiced in a way that a mother or father or parent would also rejoice when one his or her children “gets it” or gets with the program, however long that might take. It is worth the wait, worth the wait ..of waiting for Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, worth waiting for his mercy.

          Jesus remember me when you come into your kingdom.

 [__fin__]

All Souls Mass (2019-11-17, Sunday-33)

2019 November 17 /  33^rd Sunday   ●● Malachi 3:19-20a ●●●  Psalm 98 ●●●  2 Thessalonians 3:7-12  ●●● + Luke 21:5-19 ●●

Title:  All Souls Mass for Members of our Parish who have

died in the past year.

[__01__]  What does it take to win…. What is a “win” … what is a “loss”? 

Shortly after my mother had back surgery in late March – disc surgery on her spine – due to arthritis, we were in her hospital room in NYC. Given that my mother has Parkinson’s the movement disorder in addition to this back problem, we were quite concerned about our mother’s care, what would be the next step, et cetera. Spoiler alert…my mother did well with the back surgery and has progressed quite well in the past 7 months.

          On this particular evening, 48 hours after the operation, I noticed that the nurse in the hospital -whose name was David –  he taught us about what was a “win” in that moment.

          David was able to care for my mother, who was able to come back a bit and make her feel somewhat victorious after surgery, able to answer all my questions, and do all of this while we watched Michigan State win against Duke in a consequential NCAA March Madness playoff basketball game. My mother also enjoyed watching the game and it took our minds off of immediate concerns about her health rcovery, upcoming recovery, et cetera, et cetera. It was a good day also for for Michigan State.

          I am not absolutely opposed to Duke winning one more basketball game, but I was rooting for Michigan State in this particular case.  And, Michigan State was also the underdog or less favored team in this game.

[__02__]  What is defeat and what is victory?

          In his non-fiction book and research study, Being Mortal, and in his writing on the subject of death, mortality and medical care, the Harvard physician, Dr. Atul Gawande, shared his own education in caring for people who are in a situation of dying, of incurable disease, of very old age and shared that he had realized again and again that he was asking diagnostic questions often in terms of “defeat” and “victory”. He was asking his patients: , either explicitly or implicitly in the medical care field: “should we fight or should we give up?”

          Although the question is usually asked more formally as – should we prescribe more medicine, do more surgery ….[OR] should we just help you to be more comfortable?

          Should we fight or give up?

           Dr. Gawande’s point is that – for the dignity of you or me or himself – or any patient, we do not really think of our lives in terms of “do I fight or do I give up?”

          In fact, every one of us is going to die one day. None of us gets out of this competition / GAME …. alive.

[__03__]    In the Gospel, Jesus acknowledges this as well using the metaphor of the house & Temple. But, it’s not just a metaphor, because he’s talking about the overthrow or the defeat of the Temple Jerusalem.

          And, the Jewish people are used to this. Because the Temple has been destroyed / invaded before.

          And, every time it is destroyed, it’s the “end of the world”

          Or as the band R.E.M. once sang …”the end of the world as we know it”, whenever the Temple is destroyed. And unlike the song, they don’t feel fine.

          So, Jesus is using the Temple overthrow as an example of defeat.

          Now, the people may think … we are going to get one more extreme makeover out of this, we are going to re-build the Temple, like on HGTV. But, the end of the Temple is the end of the world as they know it…but the New Temple is Jesus Christ’s body.

          [** pause **]

[__04__]   Dr. Gawande’s experience was enriched by his encounter with one particular patient whose “chart” sparked the same question: “victory or defeat”  / “do we fight or do we give up?”

He encountered a a piano teacher who had an incurable cancer and tumor.

          He was told by some other doctors to interview her in the following way to ask the patient ,  “What are your goals?” / “What are your objectives?”

          Because – it is nice for the doctor to ask you the patient about your goals rather than for the doctor to impose goals.

          So, he asks this question and the piano teacher and patient says. What do you mean, what are my goals? I’m going to die, I don’t have any goals.

          Dr. Gawande was confused …the other doctors did not tell me what to do if the patient had no goals.

          So, he goes on to the next question.  What are your fears? What are you afraid of?

          Then, the patient started talking, explaining how she feared dying in the hospital, being left alone, being alone, being in pain, being incontinent.

[__05__]     All of this helped Dr. Gawande come to a greater understanding of what he calls – and what we already know – is the reality of mortality.

          Because the reality of mortality is not about immediate defeat or victory.

In other words, the real and

When we factual truth that we are all going to die. The reality of mortality.  While we come to church, to faith, to hear the Gospel with a hope of eternal life, we also come with some understanding that we are mortal, with reality of mortality.

          But, I would suggest that Jesus in the Gospel is also adding another dimension to this – teaching us about the overthrow of the Temple … and that the overthrow/demolition is not just going to lead to one more “extreme makeover” like “flip-this-chapel” or “fixer-upper” like on HGTV. Jesus is speaking of the

MORTALITY OF REALITY.

          In other words, that the structures we know today – whether it is a financial structure or a health structure (body) or a physical structure (house, tower) is not going to last forever.

          The writer – Reinhold Neibuhr – wrote a famous prayer that summarizes this quite well – for many years, I really only new the first part – Part One – of the prayer which is often an encouragement given to those in 12-step programs or the journey to sobriety. The prayer also reminds that we are in God’s hands:

          [Part 1] God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things I cannot cannot, Courage to change the things I can, + the Wisdom to know the difference.       [Part 2] Living one day at a time, Enjoying one moment at a time, Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace,  Taking, as Jesus did, This sinful world as it is, Not as I would have it, Trusting that You will make all things right, If I surrender to Your will, So that I may be reasonably happy in this life, And supremely happy with You forever in the next.

[__06__]     So, it is our hope to be happy not only in this world, but also in the next world and in the next life.

          But it is also in our approach to dying and the days we have left – all the time we have left – that we testify to the value of our lives and service we can render to each other.

          Is it simply about immediate defeat or immediate victory? We know ..that our redeemer lives.

          What are your goals? That’s a hard question to answer.

          That’s a hard question to answer. But, sometimes, we can simply answer this question – what would be a good day for you?

          It was a good day watching Michigan State defeat Duke in OT at Mount Sinai hospital and go to Final 4,  while David – the nurse – gave me his opinion on the Michigan State offense, and keep my mother interested in not only her therapy/care but in three point shots /  basketball.

[__07__]     Dr. Gawande’s testimony is that sometimes we reduce our goals only to the comforts of the patient rather than to the connections of the patient.

          He continues with the story of the terminally ill piano teacher, who was not just any piano teacher, but his daughter’s piano teacher, his 13-year old daughter’s piano teacher, and he now had to explain that she would not be taking lessons from Margaret any longer. He explained this.

          Then, something remarkable happened. A few days after Margaret returned home, her pain was more under control and Margaret called the Gawande home and asked to speak to her student, invited her to come for a lesson.

In the final weeks of her life, she continued to give lessons, meet students, give away music, even hold two recitals in her home.

And, while her total time at home was only about 6 weeks, this was about a month longer than expected.  While everything – in fact – was taken from here in the reality of mortality and mortality of reality.   There was also – in the dying process – a giving back and gift giving to her students.  

Those who die not simply leave us, they teach us how to live, when not a stone will be left upon another stone.

 Living one day at a time, Enjoying one moment at a time, Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace, Taking, as Jesus did, This sinful world as it is, Not as I would have it, Trusting that You will make all things right, If I surrender to Your will, So that I may be reasonably happy in this life, And supremely happy with You forever in the next. [__fin__]